My Stop and Think Moment of Today

Last week I was home visiting my family in Maryland and I remember hearing something on the news about a man in Utah who was sentenced to death for murder.  This man elected to be put to death by firing squad, which is apparently still an acceptable method of killing. That sounds weird doesn't it - acceptable method of killing. Now I am not writing this to alienate anyone, nor do I wish to convince anyone of anything. I merely need to express what I have come to think about the death penalty.

I remember very clearly being in 8th grade and talking about the death penalty. I can even remember my exact seat in this class. My friend, Meghann, said that she did not believe in the death penalty and I thought she was crazy. I said to her "You mean to tell me if someone killed your Mom you wouldn't want them to die!?" She said that she wouldn't and I thought she was a fool. Well I don't know when my feelings changed or why, but today when I heard that the members of the firing squad would each receive a commemorative coin for their participation in the "shooting" I felt so sick to my stomach. I have known before today that my views had changed but I just felt so moved to write about it after seeing this.

My favorite movie and one of my favorite books is The Lord of the Rings. There are two scenes in the movie that apply to this situation. In one, Frodo says to Gandalf that it is a pity Bilbo didn't kill Gollum when he had the chance. Gandalf looks at Frodo and says that it was pity that stayed Bilbo's hand. He then explains that everyone has roles to play, whether they are for good or evil, that no one can predict. It turns out that if Bilbo had killed Gollum, Frodo would never have destroyed the ring and evil would have been allowed to prevail. Later in the book Gandalf says this: "Many that live deserve death. And some die that deserve life. Can you give it to them? Then be not too eager to deal out death in the name of justice, fearing for your own safety. Even the wise cannot see all ends."

These two quotes really encompass my feelings on the death penalty. Other people may turn to scripture or to the Constitution, but to me, its more about knowing my limits. I do not feel like I have the power to end someones life. Period. And I certainly do not think that someone should be given a coin remembering such an event. What exactly will they do with it? Is it something you will proudly show your grand kids one day? Will they end up as collectors items on Ebay?! The whole thing just makes me question who I am and what I believe in deep down inside.

So that is my reflection for the day. Kind of long and depressing to start things off, but that's why I created the blog - to get these things out! Writing this made me realize how much I miss putting my thoughts and opinions on paper, or well, the screen.